


the world awaits

by sunshinias



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Ambiguous/Open Ending, M/M, Pining, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:14:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27694667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshinias/pseuds/sunshinias
Summary: "Six hours?" Mark repeats. "You think my soulmate lives six hours away?""It could also be eight hours," Renjun says helpfully. "Or seven, but in a different direction, so we should probably save that one for last."Mark grimaces, so Renjun offers him an unnecessarily bright smile. "Hey, you'll have me for company. It'll be fun!"An impromptu road trip was not the plan Mark had in mind for meeting his soulmate, but if the universe wants him to have an adventure, who is he to deny it?
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Mark Lee
Comments: 8
Kudos: 57
Collections: Challenge #3 — soulmates





	the world awaits

The driveway is absurdly long.

Calling it a driveway is a bit of a stretch, really, but – given the very large sign at the start proclaiming it was “NOT A ROAD” – driveway is the only thing Mark can think to call it.

“Did you ever dream about this sort of place?” Renjun asks.

“You read my dream diary,” Mark says. “Shouldn’t you know that?”

Renjun gives him a look. “I read years worth of poorly-described dreams in a week. How well do you think I remember their content?”

Mark clears his throat, embarrassed. “No, I don’t recognize this place.”

“Okay,” Renjun says, smug, and Mark lets the conversation drop, too nervous for banter.

Mark swears he's barely breathing by the time he pulls up at the house, like all his air was left at the start of the driveway.

Renjun catches Mark’s eye. “You ready?”

“No,” Mark says. Then, “Yes. But I'm terrified.”

"Where's that adventurous attitude you had earlier in the week, talking about how the world awaits and everything?"

Mark shakes his head. "This is scary, okay?"

"You weren't this scared when you met me," Renjun points out. "Or my roommates. Or the last person."

“It gets scarier each time,” Mark protests, but reluctantly gets out of the car anyway.

Mark trips twice on his way to the door. Renjun doesn’t wait for him, and he’s already knocking on the door before Mark can even get up the steps.

The wait is probably only a few minutes, but it feels like half an hour passes. “Maybe he’s not home,” Mark suggests, trying and failing to not sound like a fish suffocating on air.

“Maybe.” Renjun knocks on the door again.

This time there’s the muted sound of footsteps, and then the door opens. “Hello?” 

He’s taller than Mark, and so handsome he looks like he’s come right out of a movie. Their eyes meet briefly – this man isn’t Mark’s soulmate either.

Mark glances at Renjun, shakes his head slightly at the question in Renjun’s expression.

“My friend thought this might be where his soulmate lives,” Renjun explains to the man. “But it looks like that’s not the case.”

“I’m really sorry for bothering you,” Mark says, starting to retreat. “We’ll be going now.” Halfway down the steps now. “Sorry again.”

“Wait!” the man says.

Mark freezes, slowly turning his head back to look at the man.

“I was making lunch and I made... a quadruple batch by accident?” He laughs sheepishly. “Do you want to come in? Before you go? There’s no way I could eat all of it.”

Mark looks at Renjun, who shrugs.

“...Okay,” Mark says. The man smiles, and Mark can’t help but feel like Hansel and Gretel.

* * *

“How did you even manage to make a quadruple batch?”

“The recipe is for two people,” the man – who’d introduced himself as Jaehyun – explains. “But my friend’s not here so I was going to half the recipe... accidentally doubled it instead.”

“Oh, will your friend be back later, then?” Mark asks hopefully. Maybe his soulmate lives here after all.

Jaehyun shakes his head. “He’s actually out of the country for the next couple of weeks on a trip. That’s why– I was actually feeling a bit lonely without him?” He rubs the back of his neck. “So that’s why I invited you guys in.”

“Are you sure it’s not because you’re going to cook us in a stew?” Mark attempts to joke. Renjun gives him a weird look, but Jaehyun laughs.

“I already made way too much food,” he says. “If I had to cook you two up, it would be...” He looks them over. “Not that much more actually; you’re kind of scrawny.”

“Hey!” Renjun says.

Jaehyun just grins and gestures for them to sit down.

“So... you’re looking for your soulmate?” Jaehyun asks. “I... don’t know how that usually goes. Dreams, right?”

“Yeah,” Mark says. “I thought I had it figured out, but both the places I’ve gone to now weren’t the right one. I probably should have waited a couple months until I was more sure.”

“But this way you met me,” Renjun says. “Your new best friend.”

Mark smiles at him. He’s not sure if the descriptor is accurate, but he does know that he would be devastated if Renjun left him – even though they’ve only known each other for a week.

“What about you, Renjun?” Jaehyun asks. “Are you looking for your soulmate too?”

“Oh, I don’t have one,” Renjun says. “I’m just along for the adventure.”

Jaehyun’s eyes widen. “You... don’t have a soulmate? Did something happen to them?”

“No, I was just born without one,” Renjun says. He shrugs. “I don’t really feel like I need one, either.”

“That sounds... freeing,” Jaehyun admits. “Sometimes I wish soulmates didn’t exist.”

Mark’s jaw drops. Soulmates are a gift from  _ the universe _ – how can Jaehyun even think that?

“Have you ever met your soulmate?” Renjun asks, like there’s nothing abnormal about what Jaehyun had said.

Jaehyun shakes his head. “I’ve never looked. I don’t know if I could love them. I’ve... been in love with the same person for ten years, and I don’t see that changing.”

“Your friend?” Renjun asks knowingly – Jaehyun nods – though how Renjun figured that out, Mark has no idea.

“My best friend,” Jaehyun adds. “We met in college and we’ve kind of been inseparable ever since. I always thought it might mean something, but...”

“The friend that’s taking a trip?” Mark clarifies. “Why is he going without you if you’re inseparable?”

Jaehyun smiles thinly, the warmth that’s been ever-present since he’d opened the door evaporating from his face. “He’s visiting his soulmate,” Jaehyun explains. “They live halfway around the world from each other.”

“Oh,” Mark says, and wishes he hadn’t asked. “I’m so sorry, dude.”

Jaehyun waves him off. “It’s fine; I’ve accepted it now.”

“You don’t have to be alone forever,” Mark says. “I’m sure if you met your soulmate, you’d fall in love with them. I mean, it’s your  _ soulmate. _ I’m pretty sure it’s inevitable.”

‘It’s– it’s fine,” Jaehyun repeats. “Besides, looking for my soulmate... I’m not sure where to even start.”

“Just– anywhere, dude. The world awaits.”

Jaehyun looks out the window. “I moved out here to get away from the world,” he says, almost to himself. “I don’t know if I’m ready to go back to it.”

* * *

The mood is heavy as Mark and Renjun set off again. They’ve only just met, but all Mark wants right now is for Jaehyun to meet his soulmate and be happy.

“I'm never gonna be like that,” Mark says, “pining after someone who can't love me back. I'm so glad I have my soulmate.”

Renjun flushes and looks out the window. “Yeah. Pining is annoying.”

It hits Mark then, that Renjun has probably pined after a lot of people. He doesn’t need Mark rubbing it in.

“Sorry, I didn’t think,” Mark says. “I– it sucks that you don’t have a soulmate.”

“I already told you I didn’t need one,” Renjun says. “It’s not a big deal.”

But he doesn’t look back at Mark, eyes steadfastly focused on the road as they pull down the long driveway, and Mark can’t help but feel like he’s messed up.

* * *

* * *

"This road reminds me of my friends’ house," Renjun says, the first words he’s spoken since they left Jaehyun’s place. It feels something like a peace offering.

Mark glances at Renjun. He seems to want to say something else, but doesn’t.

“So... how did you meet these friends?” Mark asks.

“We were classmates when we were younger,” Renjun says. “None of us had soulmate dreams, so we just naturally became friends. I actually–” Renjun squirms. “I had a crush on one of them for like six months, but that’s embarrassing so don’t tell them.”

“When would I tell them?” Mark asks.

“Oh, well...” Renjun shrugs. “I just assumed I’d introduce you to them eventually. I mean, they’re pretty close friends, and you’re...” Renjun’s voice gets a little strange. “I just want you to meet them.”

“Oh.” Mark feels himself go a little warm. “Thanks, dude. That’s really nice.” He blinks. “Did you say  _ six months? _ That’s a really long time to have a crush.”

Renjun snorts. “No, it’s not.”

“I’ve  _ never _ had a crush that long,” Mark says. “And I don’t think any of my friends have either.”

“Mark, have you even  _ had _ a crush before?”

“Well, sort of,” Mark says. “But it wasn’t, like, a ‘writing love letters to them every night in my diary’ sort of thing. They only ever lasted a few days.”

“That’s crazy,” Renjun says. “Even Jaemin had crushes – real crushes – before he met his soulmate. And he even– we even–” He shakes his head. “What if you meet your soulmate and you don’t even like them?”

_ “What?” _ Mark says, aghast. “Of course I’m going to like them! Dude, they’re my soulmate!”

“If you say so,” Renjun says dubiously. “It’s just, if you’ve never liked someone like that, then how do you know you can?”

“I still  _ had _ crushes,” Mark says. “But then they weren’t my soulmate, so I stopped really caring about them. Like, what's the use with daydreaming about someone else when I have a soulmate out there?" Mark continues, then winces and looks over at Renjun, hoping he hasn’t offended him again. "I guess you've probably had lots of crushes."

"Yeah," Renjun says. “Mostly they were pretty fruitless – you know how it is, everyone wants their soulmate – but I’ve gone out with a few. I had a boyfriend for three months. Didn’t work out, obviously, but we’re still friends.”

“Do you have a crush right now?” Mark asks. 

Renjun doesn’t answer for a moment, and when Mark glances over, he’s staring at Mark, an unreadable expression on his face. “Yeah,” he says.

“Do you think they might like you back?”

“Well– he has a soulmate," Renjun says. "And I think he’s pretty set on them, so probably not." He sighs quietly, then continues, “It’s too bad because, this guy, he’s a really cool person, and I feel like, maybe, he would like me if it wasn’t for soulmates existing.”

There it is again – Renjun sounds so bitter about soulmates existing, but Mark can’t imagine a world without them. He’s been waiting for his soulmate his whole life, and the idea of not having one is... terrifying. Bleak. How can Renjun sound so nonchalant about it? How can he even face the world knowing he’s alone?

“Mark...?” Renjun says. “Are you crying?”

Mark wipes his cheeks and is surprised to feel wetness there.

“What’s wrong?” Renjun asks. “You’re not crying over me, are you?”

“It’s just – what if this next place isn’t it either?” Mark asks, trying to keep his voice from trembling. “What if we keep looking forever and ever but none of the places are right? What if I  _ never _ find my soulmate?”

Renjun draws in a heavy breath. “Mark...”

“What am I gonna do without them?”

“I... I assume that you’ll meet your soulmate eventually,” Renjun says carefully. “I think that’s part of how fate works, right?” He waits for Mark to nod before continuing. “But... if you don’t – if you have to keep looking forever – you’ll still have me. I’ll– I’ll take care of you.”

Mark looks into his eyes then, and sees... so much. Sincerity, warmth, and something deeper and melancholy. It stirs  _ something _ in Mark’s chest, an odd fluttery feeling that he’s not quite sure what to do with.

Then Renjun’s eyes snap back to the road, and Mark is left quivering internally, cheeks warm.

“Thank you, Renjun,” Mark says softly, smiling to himself.

Renjun doesn’t say anything, but he reaches across the console and squeezes Mark’s hand, mirroring Mark’s smile.

* * *

* * *

There’s no long driveway this time as they draw closer to the possible place, just house after house, a little bland and unmysterious, not like Jaehyun’s surroundings at all. The house they’re looking for isn’t much different than all the others around it, but when Mark sees it he gasps. 

“I saw this place last night. I dreamed about it.”

“Really?” Renjun says. “Are we actually at the right place?”

“I– I guess we are.” Mark feels so relieved. After all his failed attempts at finding his soulmate, the universe is finally cutting him a break. Here he is, inches away from his dreams coming true. About to meet his soulmate.

“Are you ready to meet them?” Renjun asks, nudging Mark, smiling brightly like an incandescent lightbulb.

“...Yeah,” Mark croaks.

Renjun’s expression softens, and he makes a small, aborted movement toward Mark. “You don’t have to,” he says quietly. “If that’s not what you want.”

“No, I can do this,” Mark says. “It’s just... this is really nerve-wracking. It’s like... the first day of my life truly starting.”

Renjun tilts his head slightly, brow furrowing. “What was our little road trip then, just a break from reality?” His voice has that strange quality to it again, and – though he’s looking right at Mark – he speaks almost to himself. 

Renjun blinks, flinching back slightly as if coming out of a trance. “You’ll be fine, okay?” He pats Mark’s shoulder. “Go get your soulmate.”

Mark blanches. “Wait, you’re not going up there with me?”

“...I can if you want me to,” Renjun says slowly. “Don’t you want this moment to be just the two of you? Since you know that this time it  _ is _ your soulmate? Isn’t that more romantic?”

“Oh. Right,” Mark says, though a part of him feels like he needs Renjun by his side. “Yeah, I guess.”

“That’s what I thought.”

They stare at each other for a moment. There’s something in Renjun’s eyes that Mark can’t place, something that seems to be telling him,  _ “Stay here.” _ Mark hesitates – part of him wants to listen, to stay in the safety of the car forever.

“Mark?” Renjun’s breath hitches. “Are you... are you gonna go?”

Mark nods a little jerkily and looks away. “Yeah,” he says. He takes a deep breath and opens the door.

“Good luck,” Renjun says behind him.

Mark stands in front of the door for far too long before he even dares to knock on it, palm sweaty. Immediately he hears a dog barking, someone quieting it, and then footsteps.

A young man – about Mark’s age – opens the door. Their eyes meet, and– 

Suddenly, the world has shifted by ten degrees.

Tingles run down Mark’s body to his toes, leaving him quivering and faint, but instead of feeling lightheaded he feels like an ocean couldn’t sweep him off his feet. Warmth floods him, safe and familiar like a winter fireplace. He sees constellations in the man’s eyes, galaxies, whole universes. He feels so happy he could outshine the sun, so calm he could pass through a hurricane without notice, so amped up he could power a city, so awestruck he can’t feel himself breathing. And then all at once the rush leaves him, and Mark knows, with absolute certainty, that this man is his soulmate.

Mark's eyes rove across his soulmate. He's a little shorter than Mark, with fluffy-looking, somewhat long black hair that falls, loose and unstyled, across his forehead and into his eyes. His skin seems to  _ glow _ in the sunlight, and moles dot across it, like the constellations Mark had seen in his eyes.

He’s almost drowning in a pink hoodie, sleeves bunched up but still so long that they cover his fingers. Peeking out from his sweatpants are yellow socks with little rosy-cheeked duck faces on them. Mark has to resist squealing at the cuteness.

"Um, hello," his soulmate says. 

Mark startles, whipping his gaze back up to his soulmate’s eyes, and realizes that, embarrassingly, his mouth is still hanging open. He quickly closes it.

"Hi, I'm– I'm Mark,” he says, feeling self-conscious.

“Donghyuck,” his soulmate replies, tapping a hand to his chest. “Is there something you want?” His voice is firm but soft and warm and honey-like, and Mark suddenly remembers hearing that voice singing love songs in his dreams.

“Hello?” Donghyuck snaps his fingers in front of Mark, and Mark startles again. “I asked why you were here?”

“Well–” Mark is... confused. Didn’t Donghyuck feel the rush of emotions and feeling and  _ everything _ too? “I'm your soulmate.” He offers Donghyuck a smile that he hopes comes across as warm and excited.

"Oh, right." Donghyuck fidgets a little, looking uncomfortable. "I'm not interested, sorry."

_ What? _ Time slows to a crawl, and it takes effort for Mark to work out the meaning of those words put together.

_ I’m not interested, sorry. _

_ I’m not interested... in soulmates? _

_ I’m not interested in  _ you?

"I'm taken, and very happy," Donghyuck adds, thoroughly smashing what's left of Mark's dreams into bits.

Mark tries to protest, but all that comes out is a croak.

“It was, um... nice? meeting you,” Donghyuck says. “But I think it's best if you go now.”

He shuts the door, and Mark can only stare, dumbfounded.  _ I’m taken, _ his soulmate had told him.

His  _ soulmate. _

_ His _ soulmate.

Mark contemplates knocking again, but what's the point when he's been so summarily rejected? He turns around and starts down the steps, neck prickling with heat, eyes trained on the ground.

He avoids looking at Renjun when he gets in the car. What is he even supposed to say?

“Mark...” Renjun says, voice dripping with pity. “What happened?”

Mark stares down a leaf at the edge of the windshield. "He... said he wasn't interested.” He's silent for a long moment. "What do I do now?"

Could he win Donghyuck over? Mark has watched an embarrassing number of romcoms where that happens, but–

This is real life.

And his soulmate doesn't want him.

“Well,” Renjun says, “where do you want to go?” He gestures out the window, smiling in a way that’s probably supposed to be encouraging. "The world awaits."

Mark has the distinct impression that the universe is mocking him.

**Author's Note:**

> [twt](https://twitter.com/sunshinias) | [cc](https://curiouscat.me/sunshinias)


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